A sponsor and his newcomer are at a meeting when the newcomer suddenly collapses, goes into cardiac arrest and falls to the floor. The paramedics arrive, perform CPR and bring the newcomer back to life.
"My GOD!" says the sponsor. "I thought we had lost you".
The newcomer looks up and tells his sponsor, "I believe I was actually dead for a short time. I saw a bright light and felt myself basking in the light of my Higher Power. I'm sure it was Heaven. It was an amazing experience!"
"What was Heaven like?" asks the sponsor.
The newcomer smiles and replies, "Well, I got good news, and I got bad news. The good news is that in Heaven they have a huge speaker meeting every Thursday night. All the greatest AA speakers that have passed away speak there".
"And the bad news?" asks the sponsor.
The newcomer looks his sponsor in the eyes and replies, "The bad news is that you're scheduled to be the speaker next week".