A grandiose drunk boards an airplane and takes his seat. As he settles in, he glances up and sees a most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realizes she is heading straight towards his seat. A wave of nervous anticipation washes over him. Lo and behold, she takes the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurts out, "Business trip or vacation?" She turns, smiles and says, "Business. I'm going to the annual Nymphomaniac Convention in Chicago."
Whoa ! ! ! He swallows hard and is instantly CRAZED with excitement. Here's the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen, sitting RIGHT next to him and she's going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs! Struggling to maintain his outward cool, he calmly asks, "What's your business role at this convention?"
She says, "Lecturer. I use my experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality." "Really," he says, swallowing hard, "what myths are those?" "Well," she explains, "one popular myth is that African American men are the most well-endowed when, in fact, it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait."
"Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent." Suddenly, the woman becomes very embarrassed and blushes. "I'm sorry," she says, "I shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even know your name!"
"Tonto. Tonto Goldstein." the man says as he extends his hand.